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Individual therapy, combined with marriage or family counseling, can strengthen your self-esteem and help you build a healthy, sober relationship. In addition to functional alcoholism, there is also familial alcoholism and chronic/severe alcoholism. If you say, “I’m leaving if you don’t get treatment,” then be prepared to follow through. If he is open to treatment, the two of you can discuss different addiction treatment types and their benefits.
To recognize that even though you’re broken, you’re so much stronger than anyone else could ever know. Strong enough to keep going when he lets you down, to pick up the slack when he drops the ball. You stay up all night with your stomach in knots, then work through the next day like a champion to keep things as normal as possible for your family. No one can fully appreciate how much you shoulder, because ironically, you spend so much time making it look like things are easy. But I know you’re exhausted on a level that someone who’s simply “tired” could never comprehend. Then he comes home when the sun comes up, after you’ve called him repeatedly with no answer, a few hours before work starts, and you know you’re right.
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You may also fear that your children are at higher risk of alcoholism later in life if they are exposed to the example being set by the high-functioning alcoholic parent. That stress inevitably bleeds into relationships, which can cause cracks and fissures that will rupture if not addressed in a healthy way. Fights over the alcohol abuse may ensue; if the alcoholic loses control when they are drunk, there is an increased risk of domestic violence. He has a solid career, loves you and the kids and is the life of the party in social situations.
Sustained Recovery
After a preliminary evaluation, your spouse will undergo an in-home alcohol detox, transitioning into a customized rehabilitation plan to ensure long-term success. Taking this approach even when confronting or facing them with the harm their alcoholism is doing to you and your loved ones is one that can yield the greatest chance of success. Regardless of how high-functioning someone is under the influence of alcohol, it will eventually result in a breakdown in their professional lives and usually when it comes to the law. It’s important to note any problems they are having at work if there are reductions in pay or disciplinary measures. Being pulled over while intoxicated by a police officer should be a major red flag.
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It should not be used in place of the advice of your physician or other qualified healthcare providers. You may begin to feel isolated and alone, and that can be detrimental to your overall health. That is a signal that you, and your husband, need the hope that alcohol rehabilitation treatment can bring.
Your partner may find it difficult to recover from alcoholism if your health and happiness is also struggling. There are medications approved in the United States to help people quit or reduce their heavy drinking and prevent relapse. A health professional prescribes them and may be used alone or in combination with other treatments. According to the National Institute for Drug Abuse, behavioral therapy is the most commonly used form of treatment. Family therapy is one of these services that can benefit you and your partner. Behavioral treatments aim to change drinking behavior through counseling.
Finding Help For Alcoholism And Functioning Alcoholics
However, even high-functioning alcoholics can’t keep drinking problems a secret forever. Key warning signs that people are alcoholics include always ordering alcohol when they go out or struggling to control how much they drink. Boyfriends, girlfriends or partners of functional alcoholics may also experience emotional or relationship problems. The difference is that they’ve developed strategies to hide or rationalize the extent of their drinking. In many cases, they may not even fully recognize the severity of the issue themselves because their outward success seems to contradict the stereotype of alcoholism.
- This could help them see how far-reaching their heavy drinking has become.
- For women, the number is three drinks on any day or more than seven drinks within a week.
- In addition to functional alcoholism, there is also familial alcoholism and chronic/severe alcoholism.
- It may be a source of enlightenment to him just how far-reaching his alcohol abuse has become.
They tend to be competent in most aspects of their lives, having a job, being successful, and taking care of their family despite their substance abuse. It can be difficult for anyone, even for the person married to them, to recognize there is alcohol addiction. Having a partner struggle with Alcoholics Anonymous substance abuse doesn’t just impact their life, but yours as well. Maybe your husband’s managing to hold down a job, but seems to be constantly drinking or always smells of alcohol.
Secrecy & Drinking Alone
- However, despite their appearances, functioning alcoholics often need a drink to get through the day.
- The outward stability only postpones the point at which the person recognizes their need for professional intervention.
- Functional or high-functioning alcoholics do not always meet the stereotypical image of alcohol addiction and are not always easy to spot.
- Aftercare and alcohol relapse prevention can help increase the opportunity for continued sobriety and abstinence.
- A substance abuse counselor, family therapist or spiritual advisor may also attend to provide an objective presence and keep the agenda on track.
If you see the warning signs of alcoholism, and if communication hasn’t broken down entirely, you may want to take an honest, compassionate and direct approach with your spouse. When he is sober, tell him that you are concerned about his drinking and the impact it is having on your family, and encourage him to seek treatment at a qualified rehab facility. It may be a source of enlightenment to him just how far-reaching his alcohol abuse has become. However, if your husband is in denial about the extent of his drinking, then he may not be ready or willing to consider seeking treatment. Our compassionate team of admission counselors is available 24/7 to answer any questions you may have before committing to one of our drug addiction treatment programs.
When trying to help a functioning alcoholic, it is essential to approach them with compassion and patience. Addiction treatment can be a long and challenging road with many ups and downs. They may also withdraw from social situations and find excuses to miss events or optional commitments where drinking is not available or possible. There may also be new legal issues arising for them, like driving under the influence or making other poor decisions. As their reliance on alcohol increases, you may begin to notice that your loved one downplays the role alcohol has in their lives and makes excuses for their actions, especially their drinking.
For instance, the alcoholic may be denied visitation rights or may be faced with a marital separation if he decides not to seek help. An alcoholic in denial may become extremely manipulative, tearful, angry or hostile when faced with the need for alcohol treatment. An experienced intervention specialist can help the participants prepare for these reactions so they can respond effectively. If someone feels they need to hide the fact that they are drinking or the extent of their consumption, especially from their loved ones, it’s an issue — even if they seem to be functioning in life. In addition to in-person support, numerous online forums and social media groups exist where spouses of alcoholics share stories and resources. While these communities do not replace professional help, they can provide immediate emotional support and valuable insights into coping strategies.